Asylum

Dogstar · 12-01-2003, 03:46 AM

Crown of thorns is getting tight
Cobalt veins pierce the night
Body shaking soaked in sweat
Spirit broken objective met

Choking on tears
Gasping for air
Fragile psyche
Hangs by a hair

Bleeding, peeling, scabbing skin
Head won’t heal, can’t calm the din
Violet rage draped in red
Scarlet letter to soul is wed

Choking on tears
Gasping for air
Blistered psyche
Oozes despair

Come to me blue angels scream
Take you far from nightmare scene
One more swallow watch the glow
Soon you’ll reach the rabbit hole

Choking on tears
Gasping for air
Shattered psyche
Beyond repair

Redeemer · 12-01-2003, 12:47 PM

Wow...mind if I borrow that? Psych, just kidding, I don't know what I would do with it if I could. But the thing is, I see a shadow of Sidonie Creed in it. It's hella weird. And very interesting. I really like your style--succinct, vivid, and very, very mature. In a few words: I BET STAPPY WOULD LOVE IT!!!! Heh heh, just kidding.

SCOTTSMYMAN · 12-01-2003, 02:35 PM

Another awesome poem by: Kerri! Girl, I was waiting for a new one. I can't believe how wonderful your poetry is. I was feeling some rage in that one! Keep the words flowing!

Dogstar · 12-01-2003, 09:24 PM

Thanks, you guys!
Sid, that's weird that you see some of you in that, but cool that people can find something in it for them. That's what I like about poems and music. It's whatever it means to the person hearing or reading it.

creedsister · 12-02-2003, 12:45 AM

more misery i think i like it

Dogstar · 12-02-2003, 12:59 AM

LOL, I hope I didn't bum ya out or anything...guess that's my negative side coming out. Writing helps me stay balanced

.

MrSeeker · 12-02-2003, 02:24 AM

That was very very good, I wish I could write like that!!!

Dogstar · 12-02-2003, 02:29 AM

Awww, thank you, MrSeeker

.

MrSeeker · 12-02-2003, 02:38 AM

Your very welcome

Redeemer · 12-02-2003, 08:15 AM

It is weird, eh? But also is the mark of some real damn good poetry.

Dogstar · 12-02-2003, 12:07 PM

Thanks, Sid! You're too kind.

njcreedite · 12-02-2003, 02:11 PM

Love it. Dark, imagery(sp?), good cadence...excellent!!!!!
Just the kind of stuff I wish I could write.......well, maybe someday.

Not there yet.....

Sheila63 · 12-02-2003, 06:32 PM

Powerful poem, Kerri!!!

I feel the intensity of the pain and desperation.

Redeemer · 12-04-2003, 12:59 PM

Hey creedite, let US be the judge of that!!!

creedsister · 12-04-2003, 01:07 PM

12-01-2003, 03:46 AM	#1
Dogstar Forum Diplomat USER INFO » Status: Young Grown Old Posts: 21,345 Joined: Sep 2002 Currently: Offline	Crown of thorns is getting tight Cobalt veins pierce the night Body shaking soaked in sweat Spirit broken objective met Choking on tears Gasping for air Fragile psyche Hangs by a hair Bleeding, peeling, scabbing skin Head won’t heal, can’t calm the din Violet rage draped in red Scarlet letter to soul is wed Choking on tears Gasping for air Blistered psyche Oozes despair Come to me blue angels scream Take you far from nightmare scene One more swallow watch the glow Soon you’ll reach the rabbit hole Choking on tears Gasping for air Shattered psyche Beyond repair __________________ Silly monkeys give them thumbs they make a club and beat their brother down. How they survive so misguided is a mystery.

12-01-2003, 09:24 PM	#4
Dogstar Forum Diplomat USER INFO » Status: Young Grown Old Posts: 21,345 Joined: Sep 2002 Currently: Offline	Thanks, you guys! Sid, that's weird that you see some of you in that, but cool that people can find something in it for them. That's what I like about poems and music. It's whatever it means to the person hearing or reading it. __________________ Silly monkeys give them thumbs they make a club and beat their brother down. How they survive so misguided is a mystery.

12-02-2003, 12:45 AM	#5
creedsister USER INFO » Status: Tree of Wisdom Posts: 8,290 Joined: Oct 2003 Currently: Offline	more misery i think i like it __________________ Hush child I,ll tell you why you have Loved Me when you were weak you have given me unselfishly Kept you From Falling Falling everywhere But Your Kness you set me free to live my life you become my Reason To Survive The Great Divide you Set Me Free Ooh Our Love Is Beautiful Ooh isn,t This Beautiful Child It Seems You Have Been My Everything

12-02-2003, 12:59 AM	#6
Dogstar Forum Diplomat USER INFO » Status: Young Grown Old Posts: 21,345 Joined: Sep 2002 Currently: Offline	LOL, I hope I didn't bum ya out or anything...guess that's my negative side coming out. Writing helps me stay balanced . __________________ Silly monkeys give them thumbs they make a club and beat their brother down. How they survive so misguided is a mystery.

12-02-2003, 02:29 AM	#8
Dogstar Forum Diplomat USER INFO » Status: Young Grown Old Posts: 21,345 Joined: Sep 2002 Currently: Offline	Awww, thank you, MrSeeker . __________________ Silly monkeys give them thumbs they make a club and beat their brother down. How they survive so misguided is a mystery.

12-02-2003, 12:07 PM	#11
Dogstar Forum Diplomat USER INFO » Status: Young Grown Old Posts: 21,345 Joined: Sep 2002 Currently: Offline	Thanks, Sid! You're too kind. __________________ Silly monkeys give them thumbs they make a club and beat their brother down. How they survive so misguided is a mystery.

12-02-2003, 02:11 PM	#12
njcreedite USER INFO » Status: INK'ed Posts: 808 Joined: Jan 2003 Currently: Offline	Love it. Dark, imagery(sp?), good cadence...excellent!!!!! Just the kind of stuff I wish I could write.......well, maybe someday. Not there yet..... __________________ eddie vedder quote:: We were both singers. Chris Cornell The first time we played he came to this little club and he told me that it was really good and he was thankful that I was there and that I was who I was, or something really nice, but the whole time he was saying this, he didn't realize but he was standing under a black light, and his teeth were glowing and his eyes were glowing. I remember it as my first conversation with Satan ..."

12-02-2003, 06:32 PM	#13
Sheila63 USER INFO » Status: Opened My Eyes Posts: 5,748 Joined: Dec 2002 Currently: Offline	Powerful poem, Kerri!!! I feel the intensity of the pain and desperation. __________________ I was selfish, but you still loved me You gave the greatest gift of all And you set me free Relearn Love

12-04-2003, 01:07 PM	#15
creedsister USER INFO » Status: Tree of Wisdom Posts: 8,290 Joined: Oct 2003 Currently: Offline	lol __________________ Hush child I,ll tell you why you have Loved Me when you were weak you have given me unselfishly Kept you From Falling Falling everywhere But Your Kness you set me free to live my life you become my Reason To Survive The Great Divide you Set Me Free Ooh Our Love Is Beautiful Ooh isn,t This Beautiful Child It Seems You Have Been My Everything

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