[bilal]

chuck norris rules!!!!!...............


When Chuck Norris’s wife burned the turkey one
Thanksgiving, Chuck said, “Don’t worry about it
honey,” and went into his backyard. He came back five
minutes later with a live turkey, ate it whole, and
when he threw it up a few seconds later it was fully
cooked and came with cranberry sauce. When his wife
asked him how he had done it, he gave her a roundhouse
kick to the face and said, “Never question Chuck
Norris.”


On June 7th 1994, Chuck Norris entered the same
restaurant supermodel Cindy Crawford was eating at.
Instinctively, Cindy swept everything off the table,
threw herself on it in a fit of lust, and begged Chuck
to ravish her. After Chuck finished his beer, he
obliged her. When Chuck's magnificent lead sperm
cannoned into Cindy's womb it went straight to one of
her ovaries and roared, "Which one of you servile
wenches thinks you can handle getting split
open by the Chuck!?" All of the eggs cowered in the
corner. The same thing happened at the other ovary. "I
didn't fucking think so!" shouted the lead sperm which
then lead the rest of the troops back into Chuck's
balls. Chuck pulled out; roundhouse kicked Cindy in
the face and told her, "Don't ever waste my time
again."




Chuck Norris doesn't dodge bullets, bullets dodge
Chuck Norris...