TOMORROW'S RAIN, a poem (any feedback will be much appreciated!)

[HESTLA'S HONEY]

Shelter's protection,
I long for
from the coming
of tomorrow's rain.

My life is imprisoned
by gripping anguish,
exclamated by
crippling inner pain.

Cold and shivering,
I am trapped under
the weight of its
torrential downpour.

I am drenched.
I cannot breathe.
I'll drown here like this,
if I do not discover
something more.

I watch in horror
as the second hand
relays to me today
is about to turn
into another tomorrow.

Desperately, I seek
undetection in
the depths of
heavy shadows.

I cling to my faith
and hope, I find
peace hidden in
its deepest folds.

If I can achieve this,
perhaps, I will avoid
the dreadful coming
of tomorrow's rain.

©2003 L. A.

[HESTLA'S HONEY]

Hi everyone, :)

This is my second post in the creative corner!! I will be so grateful for any comments or suggestions!!

I thank you all in advance!!

~Honey~ :D

[Sheila63]

Wow!! I'm not an authority on poetry but I really enjoy your work, Honey.:D I could feel the depth of the emotions as I read it.

[Aimee]

Honey,
I think that you have a wonderful grasp on words and know how to turn a phrase beautifully. I especially like how you trick your words and mold them into your own meaning, yet still manage to express something that is innately human.
Aimee

[HESTLA'S HONEY]

Hi Sheila, :D

Well, thank you so very much!! I am so happy you like my poetry and feel the emotions I put into my writing!! I appreciate you taking the time to leave a note, and I hope you will stop by and read more of my poetry in the future!!

~Honey~:)

[HESTLA'S HONEY]

Hello Aimee, :)

I am so glad you read my poem. Thanks for leaving such a warm and kind note. It means so much hearing from such a wonderful writer as yourself!! It brings me such joy that you liked my poem. I hope you'll stop by again. Bye.

~Honey~ :D

[Sheila63]

Originally posted by HESTLA'S HONEY
Hi Sheila, :D

Well, thank you so very much!! I am so happy you like my poetry and feel the emotions I put into my writing!! I appreciate you taking the time to leave a note, and I hope you will stop by and read more of my poetry in the future!!

~Honey~:)

You're welcome.:D Reading everyone's poems is inspiring me to give it a try myself. I've been feeling the need for another creative outlet and a different way to express myself so I'll let you know how it goes.

[Moonshine]

All's I can say is wow! It really struck some chords in me. Thanks for sharing.

[cjme]

I read and felt the fear, the sadness....yet you end it with a tiny spark of hope...very beautiful. Thank you

[HESTLA'S HONEY]

Hey Sheila, :)

I hope you decide to give writing a try!! It is fun and excting to express yourself through writing!! I would love to read your work. I can't wait to hear how it's coming!!

~Honey~;)

[HESTLA'S HONEY]

Hello Moonshine, :D

Thank you for the nice comment!! I am only happy to share my thoughts with everyone! Come again. It was nice hearing from you!!

~Honey~ :)

[HESTLA'S HONEY]

Hi cjme, :)

I am so happy you liked my poem! I thought about it long and hard and decided I had to end it with a splinter of hope because one has to have faith and belief in oneself to face and overcome the challanges life, sometimes, brings.

Thanks for your kind remarks. I hope you'll stop by again!

~Honey~:D

[goddess_bb]

Deeply Beautiful and Moving...I was touched by it...

[HESTLA'S HONEY]

Hey goddess, :)

Thank you so much for giving me a read. I am pleased you felt the emotions I put into this poem.

My best to you.

~Honey~ :D

[JulieCitySlicker]

Yet again another very well written poem Honey;) I like this one as well:P

[HESTLA'S HONEY]

Hey Julie, :)

I cannot tell you how happy I am that you like my work!! It means so much to me that you do!!

Peace! :dancing: :banana: :bounce:

~Honey~;)

[cjme]

I had to come back and re-read it again...there's one part that just relates today, though it might be another tomorrow...


I watch in horror
as the second hand
relays to me today
is about to turn
into another tomorrow.

Desperately, I seek
undetection in
the depths of
heavy shadows.

[HESTLA'S HONEY]

Hi cjme, :)

It is good hearing from you again.

I know how you feel. Somedays, the darkness in our lives makes us want to hide from the world. Other days, we want to bask under the glorious sun.

I've learned to take life day by day. We are going to have up days and down days. Who knows what surprises any day could bring?

Once, someone told me that I must not be afraid of the rain because the rain borns new flowers!

I truly hope you feel better today!! Look towards the brightness in your life and hold on!

I enjoyed sharing with you.

My best to you!!

~Honey~;)

[cjme]

Thanks honey

I know the words in my mind, it's just hard some days to live by them. I'll be allright tomorrow, but thank you again for the words.
And I'll be sure to read your other poems. I read one that made me think of either the birth of a new life or awaking from a nightmare. Two opposites, and yet still the same.

Have a good night :)

[HESTLA'S HONEY]

Hi cjme, :)

I am glad to read that you will be okay today!

You are quite welcome for those words. I hope they helped you.

You are right, it is hard to live by those encouraging words sometimes! But as long as they're in your head, you'll be fine.

I am glad to hear you'll read my poems.

I think I understand what you are saying about the poem you read. I suppose there are always opposing themes in most poems. We are constantly struggling with lightness and darkness, death and birth, love and hate etc. It is important that we triumph in those personal struggles. In my poetry, I try to end them with a triumph or at least with the possiblity of one. But sometimes, I don't because in life we sometimes lose those battles.

Well, again I am glad to hear you're feeling a little better.

It was nice hearing from you!!

Peace to you!!

~Honey~;)