share a joke thread

[metalchris25]

http://www.smilesr4u.com/drivers.htm

[metalchris25]

http://www.proft.org/tips/evil.html

[metalchris25]

http://independentsources.com/2006/0...-company-urls/






A little rabbit is running happily through the forest when he stumbles upon a giraffe rolling a joint.

The rabbit looks at the giraffe and says, "Giraffe my friend, why do you do this? Come. Run with me through the forest! You''ll feel so much better!"

The giraffe looks at him, looks at the joint, tosses it and goes off running with the rabbit. Then they come across an elephant doing coke.

So the rabbit again says, "Elephant my friend, why do you do this? Think about your health. Come. Run with us through the pretty forest, you''ll see, you''ll feel so good!"

The elephant looks at them, looks at his razor, mirror and coke, then tosses them and starts running with the rabbit and giraffe. The three animals then come across a lion about to shoot up.

"Lion my friend, why do you do this? Think about your health! Come. Run with us through the beautiful forest and you''ll feel so good!" The lion looks at him, puts down his needle, and mauls the rabbit.

The giraffe and elephant watch in horror and look at him and ask, "Lion, why did you do this? He was merely trying to help you."

The lion answers, "That little bastard! He makes me run around the forest like a f**king idiot every time he's on ecstasy!"

[bilal]

Quote: (Originally Posted by metalchris25)

http://www.smilesr4u.com/drivers.htm

haha.....damn

Quote: (Originally Posted by metalchris25)

http://www.proft.org/tips/evil.html

thanks...i needed that!

[eusebioCBR]

Quote: (Originally Posted by metalchris25)

http://independentsources.com/2006/0...-company-urls/






A little rabbit is running happily through the forest when he stumbles upon a giraffe rolling a joint.

The rabbit looks at the giraffe and says, "Giraffe my friend, why do you do this? Come. Run with me through the forest! You''ll feel so much better!"

The giraffe looks at him, looks at the joint, tosses it and goes off running with the rabbit. Then they come across an elephant doing coke.

So the rabbit again says, "Elephant my friend, why do you do this? Think about your health. Come. Run with us through the pretty forest, you''ll see, you''ll feel so good!"

The elephant looks at them, looks at his razor, mirror and coke, then tosses them and starts running with the rabbit and giraffe. The three animals then come across a lion about to shoot up.

"Lion my friend, why do you do this? Think about your health! Come. Run with us through the beautiful forest and you''ll feel so good!" The lion looks at him, puts down his needle, and mauls the rabbit.

The giraffe and elephant watch in horror and look at him and ask, "Lion, why did you do this? He was merely trying to help you."

The lion answers, "That little bastard! He makes me run around the forest like a f**king idiot every time he's on ecstasy!"

, you post the best jokes!

[metalchris25]

What starts with ''F'' and ends with ''UCK?''

















Firetruck!

[metalchris25]

http://ettf.net/archives/2524


http://www.fazed.org/video/?id=377

[metalchris25]

http://cleanstream.net/mirrors/bunny_suicide/

[bilal]

Quote: (Originally Posted by metalchris25)

http://www.fazed.org/video/?id=377

damn.......that idiot should have seen whats going on......

[bilal]

"A faucet, lettuce, and tomato were racing. What happened? The faucet kept running, the lettuce was ahead, and the tomato was trying to ketchup!" -- i know this one was lame

[metalchris25]

I had never heard it before though...

Reasons To Be A Guy:

Phone Conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.

You know stuff about tanks.

A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.

You can open all your own jars.

Dry cleaners and hair cutters don’t rob you blind.

You can go to the bathroom without a support group.

You can leave the motel bed unmade.

You can kill your own food.

You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.

Wedding plans take care of themselves.

If someone forgets to invite you to something, he or she can still be your friend.

Your underwear is $10 for a three-pack.

If you are 34 and single, nobody notices.

Everything on your face stays its original color.

You can quietly enjoy a car ride from the passenger’s seat.

Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.

You don’t have to clean if the meter reader is coming.

Car mechanics tell you the truth.

You can quietly watch a game with your buddy for hours without ever thinking: “He must be mad at me.”

Gray hair and wrinkles only add character.

Wedding dress - $2,000. Tuxedo rental - 75 bucks.

You can drop by to see a friend without bringing a little gift.

If another guy shows up at the party in the same outfit, you just might become lifelong friends.

Your pals will never trap you with: “So, notice anything different?”

You are not expected to know the names of more than five colors.

You know which way to turn a nut on a bolt.

You almost never have strap problems in public.

You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.

The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.

You don’t have to shave below your neck.

Gas (at either end) is cool.

Your belly usually hides your big hips.

One wallet and one pair of shoes, one color, all seasons.

[metalchris25]

http://netscrap.com/netscrap_detail.cfm?scrap_id=622


http://www.looptard.com/pics/furry_pimp.jpg

[bilal]

^ wow....thanks for the supply.......

[metalchris25]

An old man and a young man work together in an office. The old man always has a jar of peanuts on his desk, and the young man really loves peanuts.

One day, while the old man is away from his desk, the young man yields to temptation and scarfs down over half of the contents of the jar. When the old man returns, the young man feels guilty and confesses to his crime.

"Don't worry, son. I never eat the peanuts anyway," the old man replies. "Since I lost my teeth, all I can do is gum chocolate off the M&M's."

[metalchris25]

Two old ladies were waitingfor a bus and one of them was smoking a cigarette. It started to rain, so the old ladyreached into her purse, took out a condom, cut off the tip and slipped it over hercigarette and continued to smoke.

Her friend saw this andsaid, "Hey that's a good idea! But, what is that thing you put over yourcigarette?"

The other old lady said,"It's a condom."

"A condom? Where doyou get those?"

The lady with the cigarettetold her friend that you could purchase condoms at the pharmacy. When the two old ladiesarrived downtown, the old lady with all the
questions went into the pharmacy and asked the pharmacist if he sold condoms. Thepharmacist said yes, but looked a little surprised that this old woman was interested incondoms, so he asked her, "What size do you want?"

The old lady thought for aminute and said, "One that will fit a Camel."