My First Poem

Sheila63 · 07-17-2003, 05:26 PM

All of you here in the Creative Corner have inspired me to start writing some poetry. So here it is -

The emptiness
seeps deep
into my soul.
I need to feel
some control.

The darkness
is an ever
present reminder
of a longing
for something
more.

I want
something that's real
something I can
hold onto.

So please help
me find what I need
what I need
to find
some peace

Faith, faith is what
I need, what I
need to pull
me through

Any advice would be welcome since I'm new to this so I'm open to any suggestions, especially with form. If anyone knows of a book that would give me some tips, let me know, you can pm me. Thanks, Sheila.

hotforscott · 07-17-2003, 05:32 PM

I think that was a great poem, Sheila. I really liked it. I used to write poems when I was younger, but I haven't in a long time. I may do that sometime soon, or see if I can find any I wrote before.

Leader of Men · 07-17-2003, 05:32 PM

That was so touching

Sheila63 · 07-17-2003, 05:37 PM

Thanks, Carrie and Eric.

I never wrote when I was younger but in the last year or two I've been journaling more and although I enjoy that, I felt the need to express myself in a different way the other night. So I figured I'd just give it a shot.

JulieCitySlicker · 07-17-2003, 05:39 PM

Hey, Not to shabby for a first poem Shiela:P I enjoyed it very much

Sheila63 · 07-17-2003, 05:44 PM

Thanks, Julie.

HESTLA'S HONEY · 07-17-2003, 07:39 PM

Hey Sheila,

WOW!! I really like it! I like the way you changed the form. It flows much better now!! Great first poem!! Very good emotion and sense of depth!!

Keep writing!!

I hope to read more from you!!

~Honey~

Sheila63 · 07-17-2003, 07:50 PM

Thanks, Honey! I really appreciate everyone's kind words.

I will definitely keep writing and I'll keep you posted on how it's going.

Aimee · 07-20-2003, 03:24 PM

Sheila,
Well done! Very impressive first peice. Journaling is a wonderful way to clear your mind. Keep at it, and share some more whenever you're ready... We're ready to see more.

Sheila63 · 07-20-2003, 05:30 PM

Thanks so much Aimee.

I've really started to enjoy writing and you're right, journaling does clear my mind. Actually I was journaling and wrote another poem. I'll post it in another thread in a few minutes.

SCOTTSMYMAN · 07-22-2003, 08:20 PM

I loved your poem Sheila. I used to write alot when I was younger but now I hardly find the time. It was really beautiful. Writing can be a great purging of the soul

Sheila63 · 07-23-2003, 06:43 AM

Thanks so much, Kris.

You're right, writing is a great way to get thoughts and feelings out. It's amazing how writing can be such a release!! I'm really enjoying it more and more. It's something I wish I had more time to do.

07-17-2003, 05:26 PM	#1
Sheila63 USER INFO » Status: Opened My Eyes Posts: 5,748 Joined: Dec 2002 Currently: Offline	My First Poem All of you here in the Creative Corner have inspired me to start writing some poetry. So here it is - The emptiness seeps deep into my soul. I need to feel some control. The darkness is an ever present reminder of a longing for something more. I want something that's real something I can hold onto. So please help me find what I need what I need to find some peace Faith, faith is what I need, what I need to pull me through Any advice would be welcome since I'm new to this so I'm open to any suggestions, especially with form. If anyone knows of a book that would give me some tips, let me know, you can pm me. Thanks, Sheila. __________________ I was selfish, but you still loved me You gave the greatest gift of all And you set me free Relearn Love

07-17-2003, 05:32 PM	#2
hotforscott USER INFO » Status: Shed My Skin Posts: 7,130 Joined: Apr 2003 Currently: Offline	I think that was a great poem, Sheila. I really liked it. I used to write poems when I was younger, but I haven't in a long time. I may do that sometime soon, or see if I can find any I wrote before. __________________ Got a new Papillon puppy named Ajax!

07-17-2003, 05:37 PM	#4
Sheila63 USER INFO » Status: Opened My Eyes Posts: 5,748 Joined: Dec 2002 Currently: Offline	Thanks, Carrie and Eric. I never wrote when I was younger but in the last year or two I've been journaling more and although I enjoy that, I felt the need to express myself in a different way the other night. So I figured I'd just give it a shot. __________________ I was selfish, but you still loved me You gave the greatest gift of all And you set me free Relearn Love

07-17-2003, 05:39 PM	#5
JulieCitySlicker USER INFO » Status: Taken Higher Posts: 15,310 Joined: Oct 2002 Currently: Offline	Hey, Not to shabby for a first poem Shiela:P I enjoyed it very much __________________ Oh I'm a wandering soul I'm still walking the line that leads me home alone All I know I still got mountains to climb on my own Enough To Let Me Go-Switchfoot

07-17-2003, 05:44 PM	#6
Sheila63 USER INFO » Status: Opened My Eyes Posts: 5,748 Joined: Dec 2002 Currently: Offline	Thanks, Julie. __________________ I was selfish, but you still loved me You gave the greatest gift of all And you set me free Relearn Love

07-17-2003, 07:39 PM	#7
HESTLA'S HONEY USER INFO » Status: Silence Speaks Posts: 69 Joined: Jul 2003 Currently: Offline	Hey Sheila, WOW!! I really like it! I like the way you changed the form. It flows much better now!! Great first poem!! Very good emotion and sense of depth!! Keep writing!! I hope to read more from you!! ~Honey~ __________________ My destiny is in the palms of my hands!!

07-17-2003, 07:50 PM	#8
Sheila63 USER INFO » Status: Opened My Eyes Posts: 5,748 Joined: Dec 2002 Currently: Offline	Thanks, Honey! I really appreciate everyone's kind words. I will definitely keep writing and I'll keep you posted on how it's going. __________________ I was selfish, but you still loved me You gave the greatest gift of all And you set me free Relearn Love

07-20-2003, 03:24 PM	#9
Aimee USER INFO » Status: INK'ed Posts: 822 Joined: Sep 2002 Currently: Offline	Sheila, Well done! Very impressive first peice. Journaling is a wonderful way to clear your mind. Keep at it, and share some more whenever you're ready... We're ready to see more. __________________ The capacity for passion is both cruel and divine. George Sand - 1834

07-20-2003, 05:30 PM	#10
Sheila63 USER INFO » Status: Opened My Eyes Posts: 5,748 Joined: Dec 2002 Currently: Offline	Thanks so much Aimee. I've really started to enjoy writing and you're right, journaling does clear my mind. Actually I was journaling and wrote another poem. I'll post it in another thread in a few minutes. __________________ I was selfish, but you still loved me You gave the greatest gift of all And you set me free Relearn Love

07-23-2003, 06:43 AM	#12
Sheila63 USER INFO » Status: Opened My Eyes Posts: 5,748 Joined: Dec 2002 Currently: Offline	Thanks so much, Kris. You're right, writing is a great way to get thoughts and feelings out. It's amazing how writing can be such a release!! I'm really enjoying it more and more. It's something I wish I had more time to do. __________________ I was selfish, but you still loved me You gave the greatest gift of all And you set me free Relearn Love

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