Five ways of understanding engineers

Mulletman · 03-13-2004, 12:04 AM

I got this in an email from a friend. Enjoy!

Understanding Engineers - Take One

Two engineering students crossing the campus when one said, "Where did you get such a great bike?" The second engineer replied, "Well, I was walking along yesterday minding my own business when a beautiful woman rode up on this bike. She threw the bike to the ground, took off all her clothes and said, "Take what you want." The first engineer nodded approvingly, "Good choice; the clothes probably wouldn't have fit."

Understanding Engineers - Take Two

To the optimist, the glass is half full. To the pessimist, the glass is half empty. To the engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.

Understanding Engineers - Take Three

A pastor, a doctor and an engineer were waiting one morning for a particularly slow group of golfers. The engineer fumed, "What's with these guys? We must have been waiting for 15 minutes!" The doctor chimed in, "I don't know, but I've never seen such ineptitude!" The pastor said, "Hey, here comes the greens keeper. Let's have a word with him." "Hi George! Say, what's with that group ahead of us? They're rather slow, aren't they?" The greens keeper replied, "Oh, yes, that's a group of blind firefighters. They lost their sight saving our clubhouse from a fire last year, so we always let them play for free anytime." The group was silent for a moment. The pastor said, "That's so sad. I think I will say a special prayer for them tonight." The doctor said, "Good idea. And I'm going to contact my ophthalmologist buddy and see if there's anything he can do for them." The engineer said, "Why can't these guys play at night?"

Understanding Engineers - Take Four My personal Favorite

What is the difference between Mechanical Engineers and Civil Engineers? Mechanical Engineers build the weapons and Civil Engineers build the targets.

Understanding Engineers - Take Five

The graduate with a Science degree asks, "Why does it work?" The graduate with an Engineering degree asks, "How does it work?" The graduate with an Accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?" The graduate with an Arts degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?"

Alter Shredder · 03-13-2004, 01:14 AM

very funny

And the first one sounds like, Dumb and Dumber

facelessman · 03-13-2004, 03:04 AM

haha awesome

Lechium · 03-13-2004, 04:01 AM

Quote: (Originally Posted by Mulletman) Understanding Engineers - Take Five

The graduate with a Science degree asks, "Why does it work?" The graduate with an Engineering degree asks, "How does it work?" The graduate with an Accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?" The graduate with an Arts degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?"

this is fucking stupid and ignorant

RMadd · 03-13-2004, 04:27 AM

i thought #5 was the funniest of all! #3 was good too.
as for you, lech, please refrain from calling anything (or anyone, for that matter) ignorant. it becomes annoying when that's about your only response to statements made with which you do not agree.

Lechium · 03-13-2004, 05:42 AM

Quote: (Originally Posted by BearFan) i thought #5 was the funniest of all! #3 was good too.
as for you, lech, please refrain from calling anything (or anyone, for that matter) ignorant. it becomes annoying when that's about your only response to statements made with which you do not agree.

It's not about me agreeing or disagreeing... you cant agree or disagree with a joke anyways lol

It's about joke being taseless and based on groundless stereotype.

TeriB19 · 03-13-2004, 09:40 AM

Quote: (Originally Posted by Lechium) this is fucking stupid and ignorant

Spoken like a man with an Arts Degree!

Mullet those were really funny!

GoodGodGirl23 · 03-13-2004, 02:01 PM

Those were funny....

RMadd · 03-13-2004, 02:58 PM

Quote: (Originally Posted by Lechium) It's about joke being taseless and based on groundless stereotype.

aren't most jokes based on stereotypes, anyways? that's what makes 'em so damn funny! i mean, the obvious 'blonde jokes'... if you think about it, a vast number of jokes are based on stereotypes, so just deal with it...

TeriB19 · 03-13-2004, 11:41 PM

Bearfan, he'll get back to you when his shift is over at McDonalds.

just kidding, leech, don't get your panties in a bunch.

Higher_Desire · 03-14-2004, 03:14 AM

Very funny. I think #2 is my favorite. I heard #1 before sometime with something other than engineers, but can't remember what.

H-D

JenRN · 03-14-2004, 10:07 AM

LOL.... I have some engineering friends, I can laugh at this and find lots of humor in it!

Sheila63 · 03-14-2004, 02:55 PM

Those are great, Mullet.

I think #1, #2 and #5 are my favorites.

03-13-2004, 04:01 AM	#4
Lechium USER INFO » Status: Bound and Tied Posts: 2,293 Joined: Feb 2003 Currently: Offline	Quote: (Originally Posted by Mulletman) Understanding Engineers - Take Five The graduate with a Science degree asks, "Why does it work?" The graduate with an Engineering degree asks, "How does it work?" The graduate with an Accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?" The graduate with an Arts degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?" this is fucking stupid and ignorant __________________ You bet I look good on the dance floor.

03-13-2004, 05:42 AM	#6
Lechium USER INFO » Status: Bound and Tied Posts: 2,293 Joined: Feb 2003 Currently: Offline	Quote: (Originally Posted by BearFan) i thought #5 was the funniest of all! #3 was good too. as for you, lech, please refrain from calling anything (or anyone, for that matter) ignorant. it becomes annoying when that's about your only response to statements made with which you do not agree. It's not about me agreeing or disagreeing... you cant agree or disagree with a joke anyways lol It's about joke being taseless and based on groundless stereotype. __________________ You bet I look good on the dance floor.

03-13-2004, 09:40 AM	#7
TeriB19 Forum Diplomat USER INFO » Status: Saving Grace Posts: 12,439 Joined: Sep 2002 Currently: Offline	Quote: (Originally Posted by Lechium) this is fucking stupid and ignorant Spoken like a man with an Arts Degree! Mullet those were really funny! __________________ MK: We're never gonna have the Super Bowl of Scott Stapp vs. Myles Kennedy in a sing-off - it's ridiculous. SP: Actually, we are setting that up. MT: It was in your contract when you signed up with us.

03-13-2004, 02:58 PM	#9
RMadd USER INFO » Status: Found The Real Posts: 10,546 Joined: Aug 2003 Currently: Offline	Quote: (Originally Posted by Lechium) It's about joke being taseless and based on groundless stereotype. aren't most jokes based on stereotypes, anyways? that's what makes 'em so damn funny! i mean, the obvious 'blonde jokes'... if you think about it, a vast number of jokes are based on stereotypes, so just deal with it... __________________

03-13-2004, 11:41 PM	#10
TeriB19 Forum Diplomat USER INFO » Status: Saving Grace Posts: 12,439 Joined: Sep 2002 Currently: Offline	Bearfan, he'll get back to you when his shift is over at McDonalds. just kidding, leech, don't get your panties in a bunch. __________________ MK: We're never gonna have the Super Bowl of Scott Stapp vs. Myles Kennedy in a sing-off - it's ridiculous. SP: Actually, we are setting that up. MT: It was in your contract when you signed up with us.

03-13-2004, 12:04 AM	#1
Mulletman Forum Diplomat USER INFO » Status: Rising Sun Posts: 4,161 Joined: Sep 2002 Currently: Offline	Five ways of understanding engineers I got this in an email from a friend. Enjoy! Understanding Engineers - Take One Two engineering students crossing the campus when one said, "Where did you get such a great bike?" The second engineer replied, "Well, I was walking along yesterday minding my own business when a beautiful woman rode up on this bike. She threw the bike to the ground, took off all her clothes and said, "Take what you want." The first engineer nodded approvingly, "Good choice; the clothes probably wouldn't have fit." Understanding Engineers - Take Two To the optimist, the glass is half full. To the pessimist, the glass is half empty. To the engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be. Understanding Engineers - Take Three A pastor, a doctor and an engineer were waiting one morning for a particularly slow group of golfers. The engineer fumed, "What's with these guys? We must have been waiting for 15 minutes!" The doctor chimed in, "I don't know, but I've never seen such ineptitude!" The pastor said, "Hey, here comes the greens keeper. Let's have a word with him." "Hi George! Say, what's with that group ahead of us? They're rather slow, aren't they?" The greens keeper replied, "Oh, yes, that's a group of blind firefighters. They lost their sight saving our clubhouse from a fire last year, so we always let them play for free anytime." The group was silent for a moment. The pastor said, "That's so sad. I think I will say a special prayer for them tonight." The doctor said, "Good idea. And I'm going to contact my ophthalmologist buddy and see if there's anything he can do for them." The engineer said, "Why can't these guys play at night?" Understanding Engineers - Take Four My personal Favorite What is the difference between Mechanical Engineers and Civil Engineers? Mechanical Engineers build the weapons and Civil Engineers build the targets. Understanding Engineers - Take Five The graduate with a Science degree asks, "Why does it work?" The graduate with an Engineering degree asks, "How does it work?" The graduate with an Accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?" The graduate with an Arts degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?" __________________ Intellectial Giant (Social Outcast) Quote: (Originally Posted by JenRN) Maybe it's time for some Mullet magic! He can do his Hoffa thing again! Quote: (Originally Posted by Harvey) Women must adore you.

03-13-2004, 01:14 AM	#2
Alter Shredder USER INFO » Status: Blue Collar Posts: 599 Joined: Oct 2003 Currently: Offline	very funny And the first one sounds like, Dumb and Dumber

03-13-2004, 04:27 AM	#5
RMadd USER INFO » Status: Found The Real Posts: 10,546 Joined: Aug 2003 Currently: Offline	i thought #5 was the funniest of all! #3 was good too. as for you, lech, please refrain from calling anything (or anyone, for that matter) ignorant. it becomes annoying when that's about your only response to statements made with which you do not agree. __________________ Last edited by BearFan : 03-13-2004 at 04:32 AM.

03-14-2004, 03:14 AM	#11
Higher_Desire USER INFO » Status: Found Peace Posts: 8,631 Joined: Apr 2003 Currently: Offline	Very funny. I think #2 is my favorite. I heard #1 before sometime with something other than engineers, but can't remember what. H-D __________________ Today I'm gonna try a little harder Gonna make every minute last longer Gonna learn to forgive and forget 'Cause we don't have long Gonna make the most of it Today I'm gonna love my enemies Reach out to somebody who needs me Make a change, make the world a better place 'Cause tomorrow could be one day too late --lyrics from "One Day Too Late" by Skillet from their new album "Awake"

03-14-2004, 10:07 AM	#12
JenRN USER INFO » Status: Tree of Wisdom Posts: 7,519 Joined: Oct 2002 Currently: Offline	LOL.... I have some engineering friends, I can laugh at this and find lots of humor in it! __________________ "I don't want to know emptiness, take me down to the water wanna be baptized in your love far away from the lonliness, take my heart and wash away the fear let me be baptized in your love" ~Lenny Kravitz "Baptized"

03-14-2004, 02:55 PM	#13
Sheila63 USER INFO » Status: Opened My Eyes Posts: 5,748 Joined: Dec 2002 Currently: Offline	Those are great, Mullet. I think #1, #2 and #5 are my favorites. __________________ I was selfish, but you still loved me You gave the greatest gift of all And you set me free Relearn Love

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