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01-29-2004, 12:29 AM | #1 |
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Exhaustion
Exhaustion You can barely raise your finger, The weight of the world crashing down upon it. You can barely crawl away from the fear, the bounds of life growing too strong. You can barely whisper any last words-the pressure grows too strong on your throat from my many protests. You can barely look up in yearning for freedom as your own mind weighs too much from all of the thinking you have done. You can barely write these words as the iron door is slammed in your face and you are shoved away from the world. Exhaustion, plain exhaustion take its full ride on your shoulders and weighs you down. Exhaustion from the roots and stems of problems. Exhaustion from everyone else's nightmares. I can't imagine what your shoes walk through everyday. I can't imagine the pains you see and understand. I lack understanding what the knife and the stab mean to you. I can't imagine what lead to your death. I lack understanding what your soul is feeling along with your heart. You have simple exhaustion. It's an eternity of riding on a roller coaster with no end. The pressures never sinking, only rising. It's plain exhaustion ready to wipe you to your limits. A tear of yours goes for miles with the Nile river. The frustration and agony you redeem from other's words, doesn't end. You try going over hills, but end up in pitless valleys. You shed your heart for other's, but other's come back and don't return the favor. You die inside because illusion is killing you...or is it reality? Exhaustion wipes away who you are. Exhaustion ruins the clarity from hallucination to realization. Exhaustion beats with your heart, only faster and more breathtaking. Exhaustion rips out your insides and tosses you in the ditch, because there was no way to stop it...or was there... Exhaustion stopped you from finding your answer before it was too late. Now exhaustion faces those who lost you and loved you. A teardrop and grieving souls remain. Exhaustion. This poem has given me countless headaches. I would really appreciate being criticized on it if you would. A rating between 1-10, 1 being worst, 10 best would also be appreciated. Sorry if it's bad, it's just a huge pain. Thanks and have a good day ya all .
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01-29-2004, 03:06 AM | #2 |
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that was really good, i can really relate to having to bear other's problems and life's difficulties seeming to have no end.
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01-29-2004, 01:47 PM | #3 |
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Tryng to steal my idea,ay? hehehe,just kidding. anywayz.
it was good, i will give it a 9 because its not the best,but yea,it was good
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01-29-2004, 04:42 PM | #4 |
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lol, it's an old one, lol
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02-03-2004, 11:39 AM | #5 |
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Torn that about pin points my life~~in a way liked it its A 10 all the way
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Hush child I,ll tell you why you have Loved Me when you were weak you have given me unselfishly Kept you From Falling Falling everywhere But Your Kness you set me free to live my life you become my Reason To Survive The Great Divide you Set Me Free Ooh Our Love Is Beautiful Ooh isn,t This Beautiful Child It Seems You Have Been My Everything |
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