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Old 01-31-2005, 10:00 PM   #1
aussiecreeder
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adam and eve the "real" story

the current story is a male conspiracy and the following is how it really went down......

After three weeks in the Garden of Eden, God came to visit Eve. "So, how
is everything going?" inquired God..

"It is all so beautiful, God," she replied. "The sunrises and sunsets are breathtaking, the smells, the sights, everything is wonderful, but I have
just one problem. It is these breasts you have given me. The middle one pushes the other two out and I am constantly knocking them with my arms,
catching them on branches and snagging them on bushes. They are a real
pain," reported Eve.

And Eve went on to tell God that since many other parts of her body came
in pairs, such as her limbs, eyes, ears, etc..........she felt that having only two breasts might leave her body more "symmetrically balanced," as she put it. "That is a fair point," replied God, "But it was my first shot at this, you know. I gave the animals six breasts, so I figured that you needed only half of those, but I see that you are right. I will fix it up right away." And God reached down, removed the middle breast and tossed it into the
bushes.

Three weeks passed and God once again visited Eve in the Garden of Eden.
"Well, Eve, how is my favorite creation?"
"Just fantastic," she replied, "But for one oversight on your part. You see, all the animals are paired off. The ewe has a ram and the cow has her bull.
All the animals have a mate except me. I feel so alone."

God thought for a moment and said, "You know, Eve, you are right. How
could I have overlooked this? You do need a mate and I will immediately create a man from a part of you.. Now let's see............where did I put the useless boob?"
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She never told a lie,
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Old 01-31-2005, 10:01 PM   #2
RMadd
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aaaaahah... not cool
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Old 01-31-2005, 10:04 PM   #3
aussiecreeder
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come on its funny and it explains why us guys are obsessed with breasts! hehe
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She never told a lie,
Well, might of told a lie.
But never lived one.
Didn’t have a life.
Didn’t have a life.
But surely saved one.
Alright, now it’s time for us to let you go.

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Wings for Marie
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Old 01-31-2005, 10:38 PM   #4
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lol. I heard that once before. Kind of an insult to my people, but somewhat funny still.

Also, I wouldn't say we're "obsessed" with the boobies. More like... extremely committed.


H-D
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Today I'm gonna try a little harder
Gonna make every minute last longer
Gonna learn to forgive and forget
'Cause we don't have long
Gonna make the most of it

Today I'm gonna love my enemies
Reach out to somebody who needs me
Make a change, make the world a better place
'Cause tomorrow could be one day too late


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Old 01-31-2005, 10:39 PM   #5
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HAW

HAW


JAw

welcome to last decade
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Old 02-01-2005, 12:12 AM   #6
Torn Daredevil
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I thought these spamming posts were supposed to stop...
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Old 02-01-2005, 12:24 AM   #7
RMadd
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i don't think you guys are understanding the point of the joke. it's calling men useless boobs. boob is a slightly older term used to ridicult people, along the lines of "nitwit". imo, it doesn't have anything to do w/ us loving titties.
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Old 02-01-2005, 12:32 AM   #8
Higher_Desire
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Quote: (Originally Posted by Torn Daredevil) I thought these spamming posts were supposed to stop...
This isn't a spam thread. It's a joke thread. They're still OK. It's just like if I wanted to start a Torn Daredevil sucks thread, that would be a spam thread. Get the difference?


H-D
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Today I'm gonna try a little harder
Gonna make every minute last longer
Gonna learn to forgive and forget
'Cause we don't have long
Gonna make the most of it

Today I'm gonna love my enemies
Reach out to somebody who needs me
Make a change, make the world a better place
'Cause tomorrow could be one day too late


--lyrics from "One Day Too Late" by Skillet
from their new album "Awake"
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Old 02-01-2005, 04:25 AM   #9
aussiecreeder
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Quote: (Originally Posted by RMadd) i don't think you guys are understanding the point of the joke. it's calling men useless boobs. boob is a slightly older term used to ridicult people, along the lines of "nitwit". imo, it doesn't have anything to do w/ us loving titties.

I think there is a double-meaning the literal boob and "nitwit" as you say hence why its funny.
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She never told a lie,
Well, might of told a lie.
But never lived one.
Didn’t have a life.
Didn’t have a life.
But surely saved one.
Alright, now it’s time for us to let you go.

Tool
Wings for Marie
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Old 02-01-2005, 05:14 PM   #10
Torn Daredevil
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Quote: (Originally Posted by Higher_Desire) This isn't a spam thread. It's a joke thread. They're still OK. It's just like if I wanted to start a Torn Daredevil sucks thread, that would be a spam thread. Get the difference?


H-D
No. They're both pointless.
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Old 02-01-2005, 06:32 PM   #11
aussiecreeder
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Quote: (Originally Posted by Torn Daredevil) No. They're both pointless.
do you lack a sense of humour?......how sad
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She never told a lie,
Well, might of told a lie.
But never lived one.
Didn’t have a life.
Didn’t have a life.
But surely saved one.
Alright, now it’s time for us to let you go.

Tool
Wings for Marie
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Old 02-01-2005, 06:43 PM   #12
DekWannaBFlea
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THAT WAS LAME



I think there should be a official jokes thread so these don't take up room on the board.
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Old 02-01-2005, 06:44 PM   #13
aussiecreeder
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I think you should just shut your mouth!
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She never told a lie,
Well, might of told a lie.
But never lived one.
Didn’t have a life.
Didn’t have a life.
But surely saved one.
Alright, now it’s time for us to let you go.

Tool
Wings for Marie
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Old 02-01-2005, 06:58 PM   #14
Torn Daredevil
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Quote: (Originally Posted by aussiecreeder) do you lack a sense of humour?......how sad
No, I don't lack a sense of humor. It's just that no one on this BB is funny...
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Old 02-01-2005, 07:16 PM   #15
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Outta here
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Oh
I'm a wandering soul
I'm still walking the line that leads me home
alone
All I know
I still got mountains to climb
on my own


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