++ Alter Bridge - Fortress ++ PreOrder NOW!!  
Go Back   CreedFeed Community > Community Central > Chat-O-Rama
Today's Posts «

Post Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Old 01-16-2005, 11:59 PM   #1
Higher_Desire
Higher_Desire's Avatar
USER INFO »
Status: Found Peace
Posts: 8,631
Joined: Apr 2003
Currently: Offline
Guitars vs. Women (need I say more?)

REASONS WHY GUITARS ARE BETTER THAN WOMEN

1. A guitar has a volume knob
2. If you break a guitar's G-string, it only costs $.79 for a new one
3. You can make a guitar scream as loud as you want it to
4. You can unplug a guitar
5. You can finger a guitar for hours without it complaining it wants more
6. Other people can play your guitar without it getting upset
7. You can finger a guitar in public and get applause, not arrested
8. You can have a guitar any color you want and no one will care
9. You can make your guitar as tight as you want it just by turning a peg.
10. If your guitar doesn't make sounds you like, you can return it
11. You can use four fingers at a time on a guitar
12. If your guitar strings are too heavy, you can just get a lighter set
13. You can have a guitar professionally adjusted to *your* liking
14. If you scratch a guitar's back, it's unintentional, not required
15. You can go to a guitar shop and play all the guitars you want for free
16. It's good to have a guitar that's stretched out.
17. You can take lessons on how to play a guitar without feeling embarrassed.
18. You can rent a guitar without worrying about who rented it before you.
19. You can play the guitar with your bare fingers and no protective covering.
20. You can get rich playing a guitar, not broke.
21. A guitar doesn't take half of everything you own when you sell it.


REASONS WHY WOMEN ARE BETTER THAN GUITARS

1. Women are more fun when the power goes out
2. You can't get your guitar wet
3. Ever try to screw a guitar?
4. The input to a guitar is only 1/4"
5. A guitar won't beg to be played
6. It's no fun to tie your guitar to a bed and spray whipped cream on it
7. When playing a guitar, you can use your teeth, but not your tongue
8. Guitars aren't very aggressive
9. A guitar won't play you back
10. You need two hands to make a guitar scream
11. A guitar won't scratch *your* back
12. A guitar won't drive you home if you're too drunk
13. A guitar doesn't care who plays it
14. You can't play two guitars at once
15. You can't fall in love with a guitar (well, maybe you can, but they can't love you back)
16. It's a lot more fun to stretch out a woman than guitar strings.
17. Guitar lessons aren't free and aren't as much fun.
18. If you really *do* want little guitars, you have to buy them.
19. You can't marry a rich guitar.
20. Even a good guitar won't usually last a whole lifetime.
21. Guitars don't taste very good.
22. A guitar won't give you head.


H-D
__________________

Today I'm gonna try a little harder
Gonna make every minute last longer
Gonna learn to forgive and forget
'Cause we don't have long
Gonna make the most of it

Today I'm gonna love my enemies
Reach out to somebody who needs me
Make a change, make the world a better place
'Cause tomorrow could be one day too late


--lyrics from "One Day Too Late" by Skillet
from their new album "Awake"
Reply With Quote
Old 01-17-2005, 02:02 AM   #2
hayley
hayley's Avatar
USER INFO »
Status: Fields of Time
Posts: 14,622
Joined: Sep 2002
Currently: Offline
Contact:  Send a message via MSN to hayley Send a message via Yahoo to hayley


Quote: (Originally Posted by Higher_Desire) 5. You can finger a guitar for hours without it complaining it wants more
LMAO

Quote: (Originally Posted by Higher_Desire) 22. A guitar won't give you head.
That was the best on there.

Those were awesome
__________________
'See the world in Green and Blue
Aotearoa right in front of you.
See the land of the long white cloud
Cape Reinga, to the fiords in the south.
Harbour lights in the City of Sails
Aroha, the love that never fails
See the bird with the leaf in her mouth
After the flood all the colours came out.'

- Beautiful Day, Auckland, NZ - 24 Nov 2006
Reply With Quote
Old 01-17-2005, 02:27 AM   #3
aussiecreeder
USER INFO »
Status: Rising Sun
Posts: 3,976
Joined: Mar 2004
Currently: Offline
Contact:  Send a message via AIM to aussiecreeder
Quote: (Originally Posted by Higher_Desire) [b]REASONS WHY GUITARS ARE BETTER THAN
6. It's no fun to tie your guitar to a bed and spray whipped cream on it


lol
__________________
She never told a lie,
Well, might of told a lie.
But never lived one.
Didn’t have a life.
Didn’t have a life.
But surely saved one.
Alright, now it’s time for us to let you go.

Tool
Wings for Marie
Reply With Quote
Old 01-17-2005, 04:10 AM   #4
RMadd
USER INFO »
Status: Found The Real
Posts: 10,546
Joined: Aug 2003
Currently: Offline
man, dude, these are awesome!
my favorites:
Quote: (Originally Posted by Higher_Desire) REASONS WHY GUITARS ARE BETTER THAN WOMEN
5. You can finger a guitar for hours without it complaining it wants more
9. You can make your guitar as tight as you want it just by turning a peg.
10. If your guitar doesn't make sounds you like, you can return it
11. You can use four fingers at a time on a guitar
12. If your guitar strings are too heavy, you can just get a lighter set
15. You can go to a guitar shop and play all the guitars you want for free
17. You can take lessons on how to play a guitar without feeling embarrassed.
18. You can rent a guitar without worrying about who rented it before you.
19. You can play the guitar with your bare fingers and no protective covering.


REASONS WHY WOMEN ARE BETTER THAN GUITARS

3. Ever try to screw a guitar?
4. The input to a guitar is only 1/4"
6. It's no fun to tie your guitar to a bed and spray whipped cream on it
7. When playing a guitar, you can use your teeth, but not your tongue
10. You need two hands to make a guitar scream
14. You can't play two guitars at once
17. Guitar lessons aren't free and aren't as much fun.
21. Guitars don't taste very good.
22. A guitar won't give you head.


H-D

i must say, combining 3 & 4 from the 2nd list can be quite painful.
__________________

Reply With Quote
Old 01-17-2005, 06:26 AM   #5
Trimontana
Trimontana's Avatar
USER INFO »
Status: Bound and Tied
Posts: 2,145
Joined: Oct 2004
Currently: Offline
Colin, those are hilarious man. I cant choose one.Great found!!!!
__________________
Papa Roach's Tobin Esperance: "If you're gonna wear makeup, it's not about looking pretty. It's gotta look like you've been up all night doing drugs."
Reply With Quote
Old 01-17-2005, 11:42 AM   #6
Higher_Desire
Higher_Desire's Avatar
USER INFO »
Status: Found Peace
Posts: 8,631
Joined: Apr 2003
Currently: Offline
Quote: (Originally Posted by RMadd) i must say, combining 3 & 4 from the 2nd list can be quite painful.
Yeah.

Two more to add to the first list that I thought of...
23 - Guitars don't get jealous when you play with other guitars.
24 - You can trade in an old guitar for a newer model and not have anyone be mad at you.


H-D
__________________

Today I'm gonna try a little harder
Gonna make every minute last longer
Gonna learn to forgive and forget
'Cause we don't have long
Gonna make the most of it

Today I'm gonna love my enemies
Reach out to somebody who needs me
Make a change, make the world a better place
'Cause tomorrow could be one day too late


--lyrics from "One Day Too Late" by Skillet
from their new album "Awake"
Reply With Quote
Old 01-17-2005, 01:13 PM   #7
creedsister
creedsister's Avatar
USER INFO »
Status: Tree of Wisdom
Posts: 8,290
Joined: Oct 2003
Currently: Offline
i found it very helpful
__________________
Hush child I,ll tell you why you have Loved Me when you were weak you have given me unselfishly Kept you From Falling Falling everywhere But Your Kness you set me free to live my life you become my Reason To Survive The Great Divide you Set Me Free Ooh Our Love Is Beautiful Ooh isn,t This Beautiful Child It Seems You Have Been My Everything
Reply With Quote
Old 01-17-2005, 01:19 PM   #8
goddess_bb
USER INFO »
Status: Strong Inside
Posts: 1,498
Joined: Jan 2003
Currently: Offline
too funny...did you come up with all of those higher??
__________________
Someone finds salvation
In everyone
Another only pain
Someone tries to hide himself
Down inside himself he prays
Someone swears his true love
Until the end of time
Another runs away
Separate or united
Empty or insane
And be yourself is all that you can do
All that you can do

Be Yourself~Audioslave

~Ignore me, I dare you~
Reply With Quote
Old 01-17-2005, 11:44 PM   #9
hayley
hayley's Avatar
USER INFO »
Status: Fields of Time
Posts: 14,622
Joined: Sep 2002
Currently: Offline
Contact:  Send a message via MSN to hayley Send a message via Yahoo to hayley
Quote: (Originally Posted by aussiecreeder) lol
I just waited because I knew you would comment on the whipped cream one .. LMAO
__________________
'See the world in Green and Blue
Aotearoa right in front of you.
See the land of the long white cloud
Cape Reinga, to the fiords in the south.
Harbour lights in the City of Sails
Aroha, the love that never fails
See the bird with the leaf in her mouth
After the flood all the colours came out.'

- Beautiful Day, Auckland, NZ - 24 Nov 2006
Reply With Quote
Old 01-18-2005, 01:12 AM   #10
aussiecreeder
USER INFO »
Status: Rising Sun
Posts: 3,976
Joined: Mar 2004
Currently: Offline
Contact:  Send a message via AIM to aussiecreeder
Quote: (Originally Posted by - hayley -) I just waited because I knew you would comment on the whipped cream one .. LMAO

hahahahha i saw this pic in some mag or paper today and it showed this guy licking cream of this girl's naval. i thought i must do that someday!
__________________
She never told a lie,
Well, might of told a lie.
But never lived one.
Didn’t have a life.
Didn’t have a life.
But surely saved one.
Alright, now it’s time for us to let you go.

Tool
Wings for Marie
Reply With Quote
Old 01-18-2005, 04:01 AM   #11
hayley
hayley's Avatar
USER INFO »
Status: Fields of Time
Posts: 14,622
Joined: Sep 2002
Currently: Offline
Contact:  Send a message via MSN to hayley Send a message via Yahoo to hayley
Quote: (Originally Posted by aussiecreeder) hahahahha i saw this pic in some mag or paper today and it showed this guy licking cream of this girl's naval.
Michael, how many times have I told you not to look at dirty magazines! It does nothing but rott your brain!

Quote: (Originally Posted by aussiecreeder) i thought i must do that someday!
lmao
__________________
'See the world in Green and Blue
Aotearoa right in front of you.
See the land of the long white cloud
Cape Reinga, to the fiords in the south.
Harbour lights in the City of Sails
Aroha, the love that never fails
See the bird with the leaf in her mouth
After the flood all the colours came out.'

- Beautiful Day, Auckland, NZ - 24 Nov 2006
Reply With Quote
Old 01-18-2005, 05:29 AM   #12
Anna1011
Anna1011's Avatar
USER INFO »
Status: Said Eyes
Posts: 4,500
Joined: Dec 2004
Currently: Offline
Contact:  Send a message via MSN to Anna1011
Quote: (Originally Posted by Higher_Desire) REASONS WHY GUITARS ARE BETTER THAN WOMEN

1. A guitar has a volume knob
2. If you break a guitar's G-string, it only costs $.79 for a new one
3. You can make a guitar scream as loud as you want it to
4. You can unplug a guitar
5. You can finger a guitar for hours without it complaining it wants more
6. Other people can play your guitar without it getting upset
7. You can finger a guitar in public and get applause, not arrested
8. You can have a guitar any color you want and no one will care
9. You can make your guitar as tight as you want it just by turning a peg.
10. If your guitar doesn't make sounds you like, you can return it
11. You can use four fingers at a time on a guitar
12. If your guitar strings are too heavy, you can just get a lighter set
13. You can have a guitar professionally adjusted to *your* liking
14. If you scratch a guitar's back, it's unintentional, not required
15. You can go to a guitar shop and play all the guitars you want for free
16. It's good to have a guitar that's stretched out.
17. You can take lessons on how to play a guitar without feeling embarrassed.
18. You can rent a guitar without worrying about who rented it before you.
19. You can play the guitar with your bare fingers and no protective covering.
20. You can get rich playing a guitar, not broke.
21. A guitar doesn't take half of everything you own when you sell it.


REASONS WHY WOMEN ARE BETTER THAN GUITARS

1. Women are more fun when the power goes out
2. You can't get your guitar wet
3. Ever try to screw a guitar?
4. The input to a guitar is only 1/4"
5. A guitar won't beg to be played
6. It's no fun to tie your guitar to a bed and spray whipped cream on it
7. When playing a guitar, you can use your teeth, but not your tongue
8. Guitars aren't very aggressive
9. A guitar won't play you back
10. You need two hands to make a guitar scream
11. A guitar won't scratch *your* back
12. A guitar won't drive you home if you're too drunk
13. A guitar doesn't care who plays it
14. You can't play two guitars at once
15. You can't fall in love with a guitar (well, maybe you can, but they can't love you back)
16. It's a lot more fun to stretch out a woman than guitar strings.
17. Guitar lessons aren't free and aren't as much fun.
18. If you really *do* want little guitars, you have to buy them.
19. You can't marry a rich guitar.
20. Even a good guitar won't usually last a whole lifetime.
21. Guitars don't taste very good.
22. A guitar won't give you head.


H-D

haha dude they are real funny
__________________
*And I know*

*You’re a part of me*

*And it’s your song*

*that sets me free*

*I sing it while*

*I feel I can’t hold on*

*I sing tonight*

*cause it comforts me*

"You laugh at me because i'm different, I laugh at you because you're all the same"


find me here
Reply With Quote
Old 01-18-2005, 10:37 AM   #13
Xterminator27
Xterminator27's Avatar
USER INFO »
Status: Said Eyes
Posts: 4,314
Joined: Oct 2002
Currently: Offline
2. If you break a guitar's G-string, it only costs $.79 for a new one

lol thats the best right there =)
__________________
If life gives you lemons,

Then shut the hell up and eat your damn lemons!

BUY MY MERCHANDISE
http://www.cafepress.com/xterminator27
Reply With Quote
Old 01-18-2005, 07:51 PM   #14
aussiecreeder
USER INFO »
Status: Rising Sun
Posts: 3,976
Joined: Mar 2004
Currently: Offline
Contact:  Send a message via AIM to aussiecreeder
Quote: (Originally Posted by - hayley -) Michael, how many times have I told you not to look at dirty magazines! It does nothing but rott your brain!
I wasen't a dirty magazine I swear! I think it was Inside Sport or something........


Quote: (Originally Posted by - hayley -) lmao

*Runs to supermarket and buys choc topping and whipped cream* LMAO
__________________
She never told a lie,
Well, might of told a lie.
But never lived one.
Didn’t have a life.
Didn’t have a life.
But surely saved one.
Alright, now it’s time for us to let you go.

Tool
Wings for Marie
Reply With Quote
Old 01-19-2005, 01:53 AM   #15
Higher_Desire
Higher_Desire's Avatar
USER INFO »
Status: Found Peace
Posts: 8,631
Joined: Apr 2003
Currently: Offline
Quote: (Originally Posted by goddess_bb) too funny...did you come up with all of those higher??
I'll let you decide that. And I won't tell you if you're wrong. lol.

Quote: (Originally Posted by aussiecreeder) I wasen't a dirty magazine I swear! I think it was Inside Sport or something........
Well, some guys look at women as sport... Not me. I'm just sayin'. And, "Inside"... herrrmmmmm... lol.


H-D
__________________

Today I'm gonna try a little harder
Gonna make every minute last longer
Gonna learn to forgive and forget
'Cause we don't have long
Gonna make the most of it

Today I'm gonna love my enemies
Reach out to somebody who needs me
Make a change, make the world a better place
'Cause tomorrow could be one day too late


--lyrics from "One Day Too Late" by Skillet
from their new album "Awake"
Reply With Quote
Post Reply


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is Off
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Storm AID> bid on guitars from your fav artists mshoneybuns Music Matters 1 08-21-2004 01:06 AM
Stolen Guitars - New Information Shadow Creed Talk 14 05-21-2004 03:43 AM
Creed Guitars Stolen in Miami Shadow Creed Talk 48 05-20-2004 02:25 AM
Alter Bridge song/ PRS Guitars altered Creed Talk 29 05-14-2004 06:49 PM
Aunt Arlene! DONT EVER TOUCH MY GUITARS AGAIN!!!!! Wylde-Tremonti Chat-O-Rama 35 02-24-2004 03:36 AM


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 06:18 AM.

Powered by vBulletin Version 3.5.2
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Copyright © 2004 Steve Caponetto. All Rights Reserved.