[Sasa]

2013 I AM GOING VEGAN


ONE WITH NATURE....INSIDE AND OUTSIDE....


When I left work the other day I was a little confused...

One of my patients got sent to ICU...

I kept thinking I must have missed something, I felt like I didn't give her what she needed...She had end stage COPD...she was a smoker and worked in a textile factory for years. She couldn't breath...she fights for every breath.

I remembered before I left her she took my hand and wanted me to put my hand on her head, and then she held it in her hand and kept saying thank you, thank you, thank you.

After that she had to be moved to a special unit. I went home feeling like I had failed...that I wasn't good enough.

But when I came back the next night ...as I walked by the rooms of my six patients... I realized 3 of them had been discharged. It has been a pattern lately.

And as I went to the elevator that morning after 13 hours on my feet...a stranger stood beside me...and as I pressed the button to get on the elevator the door immediatley OPENED UP and the stranger said to me with this familier look on his face..."You have the magic touch"...everything stood still around me as I looked into his eyes. He smiled like he had known me forever...


When I touch my patients there are times when I feel a surge of energy flow through me and out through my hands into them....it is very physical to me and them...and I wonder...is there a way to strengthen it...to hone in on it...to control it...

In such a way as we do a light switch..there must be.

I just have to listen to my inner voice and let it guide me through this process...as it has already begun to do.


I am feeling my way through this...not sure what is happening.


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