[aussiecreeder]

Michael gets off his bus that leaves him in the centre of Wellington. By this stage Hayley is 18 so she has picked him up in her first car......a rusty old 1975 Volvo station wagon with the number plate ILUVMEAT. the following conservation takes place in her car......

Hayley: Okay I'll take to my place to introduce you to the family and then we'll take your stuff to your motel room and then maybe get something to eat.
Michael: Okay cool
Hayley: Now my family is cool but my parents are a little quirky.
Michael: *shuffles in seat* Quirky?
Hayley: My dad is a very conserative guy and is a banker and is well a little over-protective. Any male who has come to my house who is not my brother has got the grilling of his life. Because of that not too many guys came home with during high school. I think that was part of his evil plan.
My mum on the other hand is just like a big sister and is a bit of a hippie. If she starts talking about free love or the Vietnam War just nod your head in agreement.
Michael:Okay I'll try to get on your dad's side and suck up to your mum.
Hayley: Good.....

They arrive at Hayley's house and walk inside where they are greeted by her parents. Mum and Dad this is Michael who I went and saw that U2 concert with in Melbourne a year back with.
Hayley's Dad: Oh yeah that would be the one you haven't stopped talking about since right?
Michael: *laughs*
Hayley: Yeah that would be the one *smiles* Michael this is my Dad and over here is my mum.
Michael: Hi Mr. and Mrs.Ginn. Hayley you look a lot like your mum.
Hayley: I do?
Michael: Mrs.Ginn if you weren't married you'ld be in big trouble.
Hayley's Dad:Watch it boy
Hayley's Mum: Oh we have a sweet talker on our hands. You've got to watch out for the sweet talkers *face goes red*.
Hayley's Dad: I don't like sweet talkers at all. The year was 1975 and I was in Year 8 and her name was Sarah. She was just perfect and I was the captain of the chess club and she was my vice-captain. I was already planning the wedding. Then the captain of the Literary Club wrote her this poem and she was gone. *sad face*

Hayley's Mum: Now Michael I hope you remembered to bring all of your toiletries. Toothpaste, shaving cream, razors, toothbrush, deoderant, rubbers
Hayley: (interupts) Mum! Stop It!
Hayley's Mum: What? Its perfectly natural me and your fath (is interupted)
Hayley: Mum you're embarassing.....
Hayley's Dad: You're embarassing the girl. Michael I'm restoring an old Aston Martin do you want to come and take a look?
Michael:Yeah sure

They walk into the garage
Michael: Where is the car?
Hayley's Dad: Just put those leads on your body
Michael: Is this a lie detector machine? What kind of banker are you?
Hayley's Dad: Only my wife knows this but I am a member of the New Zealand Secret Service. I'm semi-retired now and the salary allowed me to buy this hobby farm.
Michael: This just like something out of Meet the Parents
Hayley's Dad: I'm going to ask you a series of questions and I want the truthful answer for each one. Is your name Michael?
Michael: Yes
Hayley's Dad: Have you ever looked at pornographic material?
Michael: Excuse me?
Hayley's Dad: Just answer the question
Michael: No
beepbeepbeepbeeepbeeep
Hayley's Dad: Are you sure?
Michael: Okay I have but I don't have a single bit at home
Hayley's Dad: Okay True....Have you ever taken illegal drugs?
Michael: No
Hayley's Dad: True....Is it true the average Kiwi male has had intimate relations with an animal?
Michael: Yes
Hayley's Dad: Sadly that is true.....Okay I think you've passed this but if you're going to be around here I need to know your a man. Cancel whatever activity you have planned and you'll be joining the boys for a game of Rugby Union.

Join us next time as we document the crazy antics of this household and the big rugby game that is sure to be a laugh.