You are sooooo right, Dogstar. For so long I put off doing things and going places because of my weight. I was afraid what other people would think of me. Like you, I spent too many years not doing things or going places because of what other people might think of me. So, Julbright, I've felt that way too. Through changing the way I see myself and believe it or not, through Creed's music, my attitude has changed. Yes, I still have my moments when I feel self-conscious but I do what I want anyway. I went to the CreedFeed Fest this past May and it's only because of some the changes I've made that I was able to get on the plane and go have the time of my life, despite my wieght!!! Thanks to the wonderful people here on the bb that I met, they accepted me as I am and if I haven't said it before, THANK YOU all so much, that meant the world to me!!
As far as the feeling like a skinny person trapped in a fat body, yes, I've felt that way too. I can even fool myself when I look in the mirror but when I see myself in pictures, that's a different story. I think Dogstar is right, it's denial.