Guitars vs. Women (need I say more?)
 

REASONS WHY GUITARS ARE BETTER THAN WOMEN

1. A guitar has a volume knob
2. If you break a guitar's G-string, it only costs $.79 for a new one
3. You can make a guitar scream as loud as you want it to
4. You can unplug a guitar
5. You can finger a guitar for hours without it complaining it wants more
6. Other people can play your guitar without it getting upset
7. You can finger a guitar in public and get applause, not arrested
8. You can have a guitar any color you want and no one will care
9. You can make your guitar as tight as you want it just by turning a peg.
10. If your guitar doesn't make sounds you like, you can return it
11. You can use four fingers at a time on a guitar
12. If your guitar strings are too heavy, you can just get a lighter set
13. You can have a guitar professionally adjusted to *your* liking
14. If you scratch a guitar's back, it's unintentional, not required
15. You can go to a guitar shop and play all the guitars you want for free
16. It's good to have a guitar that's stretched out.
17. You can take lessons on how to play a guitar without feeling embarrassed.
18. You can rent a guitar without worrying about who rented it before you.
19. You can play the guitar with your bare fingers and no protective covering.
20. You can get rich playing a guitar, not broke.
21. A guitar doesn't take half of everything you own when you sell it.


REASONS WHY WOMEN ARE BETTER THAN GUITARS

1. Women are more fun when the power goes out
2. You can't get your guitar wet
3. Ever try to screw a guitar?
4. The input to a guitar is only 1/4"
5. A guitar won't beg to be played
6. It's no fun to tie your guitar to a bed and spray whipped cream on it
7. When playing a guitar, you can use your teeth, but not your tongue
8. Guitars aren't very aggressive
9. A guitar won't play you back
10. You need two hands to make a guitar scream
11. A guitar won't scratch *your* back
12. A guitar won't drive you home if you're too drunk
13. A guitar doesn't care who plays it
14. You can't play two guitars at once
15. You can't fall in love with a guitar (well, maybe you can, but they can't love you back)
16. It's a lot more fun to stretch out a woman than guitar strings.
17. Guitar lessons aren't free and aren't as much fun.
18. If you really *do* want little guitars, you have to buy them.
19. You can't marry a rich guitar.
20. Even a good guitar won't usually last a whole lifetime.
21. Guitars don't taste very good.
22. A guitar won't give you head.


H-D :pimp:

:laugh:

LMAO

That was the best on there. :laugh:

Those were awesome :D:D

lol

man, dude, these are awesome!
my favorites:

i must say, combining 3 & 4 from the 2nd list can be quite painful.

Colin, those are hilarious man. I cant choose one.Great found!!!! :D

Yeah.

Two more to add to the first list that I thought of...
23 - Guitars don't get jealous when you play with other guitars.
24 - You can trade in an old guitar for a newer model and not have anyone be mad at you.


H-D :pimp:

:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: i found it very helpful ;)

too funny...did you come up with all of those higher??

I just waited because I knew you would comment on the whipped cream one .. LMAO ;)

hahahahha i saw this pic in some mag or paper today and it showed this guy licking cream of this girl's naval. i thought i must do that someday! :naughty: :laugh:

:nono: Michael, how many times have I told you not to look at dirty magazines! It does nothing but rott your brain! ;)

:pant: lmao

haha dude they are real funny

2. If you break a guitar's G-string, it only costs $.79 for a new one

lol thats the best right there =)

I wasen't a dirty magazine I swear! :D I think it was Inside Sport or something........



*Runs to supermarket and buys choc topping and whipped cream* LMAO

I'll let you decide that. :D And I won't tell you if you're wrong. lol.

Well, some guys look at women as sport... Not me. I'm just sayin'. And, "Inside"... herrrmmmmm... lol.


H-D :pimp: