Comedy Quote Thread
 

SPANDEX! ALL SPANDEX! WHERES THE SPANDEX SECTION!!!!!!!!
Nutty Professor

Hey, that's what dating me will be like. It's a bit embarassing at first, but eventually you'll get use to it. And hey, you may even have some fun.
- Drew Carey


H-D :hypno:

Go that way really fast, if something gets in your way.......turn.

Skiing instruction from Better Off Dead.

*Fish our friends Not FOOD!*

The sharks from Finding Nemo

Arthur: Look, you stupid b*stard, you've got no arms left.
Black Knight: Yes I have.
Arthur: Look!
Black Knight: Just a flesh wound.


Monty Python and the Holy Grail :D.

FROM THE GREATEST MOVIE EVER!!!!
Nigel Tufnel: The numbers all go to eleven. Look, right across the board, eleven, eleven, eleven and -
Marty DiBergi: Oh, I see. And most amps go up to ten?
Nigel Tufnel: Exactly.
Marty DiBergi: Does that mean it's louder? Is it any louder?
Nigel Tufnel: Well, it's one louder, isn't it? It's not ten. You see, most blokes, you know, will be playing at ten. You're on ten here, all the way up, all the way up, all the way up, you're on ten on your guitar. Where can you go from there? Where?
Marty DiBergi: I don't know.
Nigel Tufnel: Nowhere. Exactly. What we do is, if we need that extra push over the cliff, you know what we do?
Marty DiBergi: Put it up to eleven.
Nigel Tufnel: Eleven. Exactly. One louder.
Marty DiBergi: Why don't you just make ten louder and make ten be the top number and make that a little louder?
Nigel Tufnel: [Pause] These go to eleven.

...THIS IS SPINAL TAP!!!!!

This is like Me w/ My Guitars!!

[Discussing Nigel's Guitar collection]
Nigel Tufnel: Look... still has the old tag on, never even played it.
Marty DiBergi: [points his finger] You've never played... ?
Nigel Tufnel: Don't touch it!
Marty DiBergi: We'll I wasn't going to touch it, I was just pointing at it.
Nigel Tufnel: Well... don't point!
Marty DiBergi: Don't point, okay. can I look at it?
Nigel Tufnel: No.

MAN IS IT JUST ME.... OR IS THIS THE BEST MOVIE!!! EVER!!!!!!!

And ANOTHER!!!

[Nigel is playing a soft piece on the piano]
Marty DiBergi: It's very pretty.
Nigel Tufnel: You know, just simple lines intertwining, you know, very much like - I'm really influenced by Mozart and Bach, and it's sort of in between those, really. It's like a Mach piece, really. It's sort of -
Marty DiBergi: What do you call this?
Nigel Tufnel: Well, this piece is called "Lick My Love Pump."

:D :D :D THIS IS SPINAL TAP RULES!!!!

He must be the king.

Why?

He hasn't got any sh** on him.

I REMEMBER THAT!!!!!! lol... Monty is the greatest...besides SPINAL TAP that is....

Spinal Tap is killer...One of my all-time faves..


"Did you have a brain tumor for breakfast?" One of the Heathers from another classic, Heathers.

Ashley - I love you, baby. I love you.
Gabriel - Hey, she just said she loves you. Say somethin'.
Rudy - I had better sex in prison.

(From the movie Reindeer Games)


H-D :hypno:

ok i got one....
"SEX CAN WAIT, MASTURBATE!!!"

You've got those.......I like those.

Johnny Dangerously

"I heard you couldn't hit water if you fell out of a f*cking boat."

Crash Davis to Nuke LaLouche (sp?) in Bull Durham